By Maxine Pollock, TIWP Student
“A book must be an axe for the frozen sea within us.”—Kafka
I choose to ignore the world that is functioning, living, breathing, and growing around me. The news, the people, the school, the work, the sports—all of it. I choose to ignore it, to tell myself it doesn’t matter, that it shouldn’t matter. So why does it continue to affect me so much? I dwell on things that should be unimportant but instead I make them worth something. I give these thoughts a feeling, give them a name, a purpose, and I visit them more often than is healthy. The bad test grade, or the bitchy girls, or the volleyball loss. Thoughts like these swirl around in my brain, following, testing, teasing. The only thing that can shove the negative thoughts into a box and keep them there is the knowledge of this. This class. These people. These conversations. This feeling of wanting and being wanted. It is like no other thing I could ever experience. For me, this is the light at the end of the hallway. This is the force that keeps me going. This is the axe to the ice that is me.