Big Girls Do Cry

By Audrey Lambert, TIWP Student

The song ‘Big Girls Don’t Cry’ makes me angry. Big girls do cry. Everybody cries, at least, if they’re emotionally mature. And that sounds like a contradiction but healthy people release their emotions. Unhealthy people lock them in. If someone never cries then they’re obviously a sociopath who can’t feel emotions. Even sociopaths fake cry to fit in. Oh, and the stigma that boys are weak if they cry is just pure stupidity. Everyone has the right to feel their emotions, even if it makes them vulnerable.

But why does crying make us vulnerable? It’s just as pure of an expression of emotion
as blowing up in anger—but that can often be seen as strength. I would argue that a temper tantrum is opens us up to much more vulnerability than crying does. In anger, you become impulsive and make far more mistakes than when you’re sad. Anger can make you hurt yourself or others. But when you cry, the worst that can happen is smudged mascara, a runny nose, and a headache from losing too much liquid.

Why isn’t laughing seen as vulnerable? It expresses joy with just as much fervor as
crying expresses sadness. It is just as loud and just as ugly but is often seen as beautiful. Why isn’t crying seen as beautiful? Tears sparkle down one’s cheek and glisten in one’s eyes. Is it just because tears are associated with sadness? Why is sadness seen as such an ugly emotion if anger results in much uglier things?

Sadness. Anger. Joy. How is it that one can be expressed with zero judgment while
others cannot?

Is there a difference between crying, having a temper tantrum, and laughing? They are
all just the purest forms of the emotion the come from. Then again, purity is often seen as vulnerability. Maybe that’s where it all comes from.

Who knew a Fergie song could bring this all up?

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