By Amy, Age 14, TIWP Student

Look at her. Her hair, her nails, her skin, her style – everything about her is flawless. She could pull off any look. You could never be like her. You try, but you try too hard, it backfires, and then you care too little. While she’s still there, perfect as ever.

But you’re different. You have heart. Instead of cutting meals, you eat when you’re hungry because you care. Instead of curling your hair, filing your nails, or shaving your skin raw, you write. You read. You sing, you dance, you laugh too loud, you love. Because that’s what matters.

When you open your eyes and truly look around for the first time, you realize that of course, every girl gets jealous. Even the one you envy, the one on top, the one who seems to have it all. Yes, especially her. And I guarantee you that someplace, somewhere, sometime, some girl has been jealous of you.

If you could talk to that girl, what would you say to her? That she’s ugly, that she doesn’t matter? That she will never be as perfect as you?

Of course not. You would turn around with compassion, kindness, love. She’s beautiful, just like you.

No matter how deep you are in your self-hatred, you are not alone.

Instead of jealousy, there could be warmth and care. We can turn those thoughts of envy and spite into compliments. Tell another girl she looks cute today, and you’ll make her day. She might even compliment you back. And if and when that girl does, you deserve it.

Next time when you stare at yourself in the mirror, instead of focusing on every imperfection, scar, or freckle, just look yourself in the eye, take a deep breath,

And smile.